frustrations
by muchtomychagrin
I hate it when words don’t do their job and when I read things like : “Life is too short to be taken seriously” doesn’t mean anything until I experience loss and grief, or when I can actually see death.
I hate that when I’m frustrated, I get morbid.
I hate that I’m a control freak that worries about the outcome of my decisions.
I hate that I let the opinions of others validate me as a person.
And I abhor, detest and loathe more than anything in the world that I know these are my problems and yet I can’t not let them get to me. It was better when I was just happy to be afraid of what other people thought and just lived my life the way I wanted other people to just see on the outside and assume the better and correct side of things. And I believed that I was still making my own decisions, but was really letting other people make it for me. You know, trick yourself into really thinking that you’re doing it for yourself.
